Interview gone wrong...

In class today, we talked about different interview styles. Interviews can be serious or playful, they can be structured or free-flowing, or they can be comfortable or awkward. There's an example of an interview that started with some structure, and then totally derailed. There are a few attempts at getting back on track, but then the speakers get distracted again.  There are some excellent, positive listener cues used throughout the clip, though! 

Something wrong with my...pants?

I was picking up on some interesting nonverbals in my Enriched English 11 class yesterday. While I was talking about the 1920s, I noticed a couple students staring downward towards my pants rather than at my face or hand gestures. I figured it was nothing until I glanced over at them a second time, and they were still doing. I was suddenly flooded over with embarrassment and self-consciousness.  What if I had a spot or spill? Or even worse: what if there was a hole in my pants?!  I had so much intrapersonal communication going on and so much psychological noise, that I had to stop and ask what the distraction was. It turns out that the braided part of the end of my belt was peeking out and unidentifiable. It was both a mystery and distraction to them.

As soon as that mystery was solved, I was able to go on with class without any problem(s).

Source: http://lubbockonline.com/sites/default/files/wp-images/pants1.jpg

Territory Examples

One part of nonverbal communication that we study is territories. There are three kinds of territories: Primary (where it really IS yours), Secondary (where it is temporarily assigned to you), and Public (where it isn't really anyone's, but it feels like yours). This past week I came across three examples of public territories in my life.

Source: http://www.hsgamecenter.com/img/logos/teams/Basketball/5bfff95df67f4f0d8523c56725b6bfeb.png

The first examples was on Saturday.  This past Saturday, the KM Speech team competed at Chatfield's high school. Although I have never attended school there as a student, I kind of feel like this is "my" meet. You see, my husband and my best friend both attended high school there (coincidence only), so I went to many events at that particular school.  Because of that connection, and the many fond memories I have in that building (speech meets, proms, dances, plays, concerts, games..), I feel like I'm going home.

source http://fitnessm621.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/10/TAEBO.jpg

My second example is from kickboxing class.  I have a certain spot in the room that I always like to be for my "place" in class.  This is another example of public, because although I pay to go to Northgate, I do not pay for this particular spot in class. I really like to be in the front row on the far left facing the instructor.  I have no idea why, but that's where I like to be.  There's another woman who sometimes gets there a few minutes before me. If she beats me to class, she takes "my" spot.  Since I'm not in "my" spot, I feel a little off for the first few minutes of class or so. It's silly, but it's true, and it makes for a great example of territory.

Source; http://kttc.images.worldnow.com/images/9262471_BG1.jpg

Here's my third example.  Last night my husband and I were talking about how grateful for the warmer weather, so we can start running outside more. He was especially grateful since he is training for his next marathon and has some long runs in the near future.  While we were talking, we kept referring to the fact that we hoped "our" trial was cleared off and not too puddle-ridden. We both love running on Cascade Trail since it is along water and near our home.  Neither of us have any ownership to the trail, it's public property, but we both feel like it is ours because we run on it so often, and it is really close to home. This is another great example of public territory.

Conferences

Earlier this week at Parent/Teacher conferences, I put something from Kelli's presentation in action. There were a few parents that night that seemed a little uncomfortable.  To help make them feel more comfortable, I thought I would try doing a little mirroring, like we learned from the presentation last Friday.  I would turn my body, slouch, fold my hands on the table, or lean forward as I saw the different parents doing. The ones I mirrored with seemed to become for comfortable, more talkative, and I ended up having longer, more meaningful conferences with those parents. The parents that were challenging to mirror, seemed comfortable right away, or seemed to be in a bit of a hurry all kept their conferences significantly shorter.  It was an interesting experiment, and I learned that mirroring really does work!

source: http://www.haven.ca/shenblog/wp-content/uploads/2014/09/Mirroring-300x225.jpg

Amazing Race Awkwardness

I am  HUGE fan of Amazing Race.  My husband and I have enjoyed watching almost every season together (I missed the first two or three seasons). While we watch, we build a travel bucket list of places we want to go, see, and/or experience some day. When the teams have to do individual challenges, we decide which one of us would be the best fit for each. It's really fun for us to imagine and dream. We've joked about applying to the show someday, and maybe someday we will...

The season that started last night is unique because about half of the teams are on a "blind date;" the people had never met before that day!  One of the teams had a really hard time clicking.  The guy is a doctor, and the girl is a tiny light blonde with a tinier voice, and she talks A LOT!  The doctor's nonverbal communication was hilarious; he clearly was not enjoying the company of his partner, who was completely playing out the stereotype of a young blonde woman. I actually laughed out loud while observing the doctor's obvious discomfort! I turned to my husband and one point and said, "I really wish she could take her voice down an octave or two." His response: so does he!

Eventually, the team seemed to find their groove and work well together.  They learned that she was much better with directions and was much smarter than she first appeared. This goes to show that you should never judge a person based on first impressions and that not all stereotypes are true.

Optimist by Surprise

Source: http://itoc.cfw.me/images/comics/72/15596f6f7e749faaf2233a7b427d88b01374105689.png

While walking through a parking lot yesterday, I overheard a couple of people while they where either loading or unloading some boxes from a large van.  One said to the other, "hey, long day, huh?"  The other responded in a grumbling voice, "Everyday day is a long day."

I found myself suddenly feeling a little sorry for the person who said that.  I looked around at the sunny sky; I looked down to see my jacket open and lack of scarf.  I realized it had been days since I had a reason to wear my sunglasses, but there they were on my face. Although I had been going for about 11 hours strong without much of a break nor a stop at home, I could agree with that woman's sentiment.  I don't consider myself a complete optimist, but at that moment I was.  I, too, was experiencing a "long day," but I wasn't letting it affect my mood or outlook.  I was looking at the positive. Sometimes, it really is all about perspective.

Merging cultures

We've talked a lot about cultures so far this quarter.  I hope I have stressed that there are many different cultures as well as more than one for everyone. Today's Snow Week dress-up day frustrates me a little bit because it is trying to categorize the student body into one of two cultures, the Athletes and Mathletes. When I was in high school, I would have  had a hard time believing that I could be a part of both; my years on the middle school volleyball team did not make me an athlete by any definition of the word. Today, though, I see myself as both. I honestly believe we are all nerds about something; we all have that one or two things we completely "geek out" over.  For me, I could "geek out" over books, especially Harry Potter ones. I could "geek out" over some specific musicians, certain movies, food, Las Vegas, Disney stuff, wordplay, Speech Team, 90s Trivia...the list goes on and on. I also consider myself an athlete now after quite a few competitive races from 3.1 miles to 4.5 miles to 6.2 miles to 13.1 miles.   The longer distances took training, modified diets, etc.  I definitely see myself as an athlete in that sense, too, due to those experiences.  How about you?  What cultures could you "geek out" over?  What makes you an athlete? Do you think you are or could be both?