"Use your words..."

I can't deny the power of nonverbal communication; it's often far more powerful or important than verbal communication, but I also can't deny the power of using words.  As my son was growing up, we often would remind him of that phrase. Sometimes noises and whining just can't make things happen, but using words to clearly communicate what your needs are can.  When Gretchen G. came to speak to us this week, she used the phrase "Use your words" quite a few times, and I couldn't help but think of using the phrase with my son and how I've just started using it for my daughter; the cycle is beginning all over again.

"You've Got....A Friend in Me" Psycholocial Noise

I love the movie You've Got Mail. I've seen it more times than I can count since the first time in the theater with my high school boyfriend, now husband.  I'm well aware of who the actors and actresses are as well as the characters, but no matter how many times I've seen it, there's only one face I can imagine when Joe Fox does his voice overs and intrapersonal communication,  and it's not Tom Hanks.  Whenever I hear the voice of Tom Hanks, no matter what movie or character, this is all I can picture:

Recency Theory

Normally, I am more of a primacy theory person, meaning first impressions stick more than most recent interactions.  Jenn from the Minneapolis Business College is the exception to that.  I was expecting my favorite MBC speaker this morning, a man named Jody. When Jenn walked in, I was immediately taken back to her last visit to my classroom where I struggled to keep up with her energy and lightning-fast pace.  That created some psychological noise for me; I had a hard time focusing on her based on both my disappointment that it wasn't Jody and the fact our last interaction wasn't the most pleasant for me. Nevertheless, she offers some EXCELLENT information and complements our Chapters 5 and 6 in class. I'm hoping you were able to still connect with and learn from her presentation today.

Music across cultures

I've been watching a lot of Olympics this year. Outside of curling, I really enjoy watching the ice skating and ice dancing programs. Something that has really surprised me is how much American music is found across cultures. For example, there have been multiple routines done to music from Moulin Rouge. Last night, a 19-year-old from Hungary performed to two songs by ACDC.  It's really interesting to me to see music across the cultures along with the more traditional instrumental stuff.

Self-fulfilling Prophecy being put to the test

I woke up this morning with the all-over aches, a sore throat, inability to "wake up," and I've been blowing my nose constantly.  I know that there is A LOT going around. I've been doing my best at washing my hands, getting my Vitamin C, and ALL THE THINGS. I have a lot going on right now, so getting sick just doesn't fit into the plans. I'm putting self-fulfilling prophecy to the test today. I keep chanting to my self that "I'm not getting sick. I'm not getting sick. I'll be fine. I'm not getting sick."  Here's hoping it works!

Perpectives and perceptions vary...

Last  night my husband and I were watching at episode of Scrubs. It's one of our favorite TV series of all time, so we decided to start it over again from the beginning thanks to Hulu. Anyway, last night's episode was a great example of perception! One of the main characters, JD, has growing envy for another character, Dr. Murdoch, because JD feels Dr. M has it all together. That's his perception of for doctor at least. But as the episode continues, JD realizes that Dr. M is under a lot of stress and can't deal with failure or death. Dr. M has a breakdown and leaves the profession. This was incredibly unexpected since most of the hospital saw Dr. M as the best interning doctor there.  Our perceptions can cause us to be blind to things if we aren't mindfully aware of all the messages being sent.

Semantic Noise in Enriched English 11

My Enriched English 11 class is currently watching the play The Crucible by Arthur Miller. It takes place in the late 1600s during the Salem Witch Trials. Although it is in English, the sentence structure and organization of words was a little different then compared to now. It causes some semantic noise for students until they get comfortable with the language. We read Of Plymouth Plantation before we start the play to adjust the students to change in the language. It's really interesting to go back and study the progression of English as we use it today.

Abiguity and Puns

My son LOVES puns! It's been creating puns since he was 4. Sometimes puns are funny because of ambiguity, which is what we talked about in class today.  When a message has more than one meaning, and we can understand that, the situation becomes humorous. Here's an example:



source: http://arnoldzwicky.s3.amazonaws.com/PearlsCatsMeow.jpg

TIES and Perspective

Last week I had the honor of attending the TIES Conference, which focused on new ways of incorporating technology in education.  I went with another teacher.  As we walked around together between sessions, we would point out things we felt would be beneficial to the other or things that reminded us of the other.  This experience gave me an opportunity to grow in self-awareness. There are things that I didn't realize I said or did in the classroom that were noticed by others. This was a great opportunity for me to not only grow from the information and experiences of the conference session and speakers, but also to grow in self-awareness.

Recency and Primacy can be "Strange"

When it comes to impression of people, I definitely following the Primacy Theory of Impression Formation. I remember not only my first impression of you, but many times what you were wearing or how your hair was styled. I often remember those early conversations of self-disclosure more than the most recent ones. When it comes to movies and shows, though, I am more Recency; I'll remember what was more recently worn, said, or who someone was styled. A great example of that is from Strange Things. My hubby and I finished Stranger Things 2 finally last night.  So from now on, when I think of Eleven, I'll picture her at Snowball, not how she was in the first season with no hair.

Culture Regret

Three years ago, or maybe four, I joined a culture I now regret. At the time, I was pumped to bring the magic that went along with this culture into my home, but now I half regret it.  It's the Elf on the Shelf culture. Each night before I can go to sleep I need to find a new place for our family's elf, Nix, to "hide" until morning when my son excitedly seeks him out.  I have to make sure it's a new spot, a spot I can reach, and a place that no one will accidently touch him or need to move him. That's a lot of pressure! And then when he talks to other families with elves there's a sense of needing consistency between homes. There are rules that go along with having an Elf in your home. The elf has a way to dress and an book that lays out the culture, too.

Cultural Norms and Ethnocentrism

Things that are normal for Americans aren't necessarily normal to other cultures. Sometimes when we see how other cultures do things, what's normal for them, we might find ourselves becoming judgmental only because what the other cultures are doing isn't "normal" to us. That doesn't mean its better or worse, remember. It's just different.  Here are some really good examples of just that:Foreign Hygiene Norms that Americans Find Disgusting

Cultures Can Surprise You!

I was reminded in class today as everyone shared their cultures that sometimes a culture can surprise you. Sure, we can often guess different people's cultures based on what we know about them, how they dress, or what they talk about. Often times, though, there are the less obvious cultures people can be a part of outside of our public knowledge of that person. It's an important reminder that we should never assume things about each other, but instead, work to get to know each other better by asking questions, avoiding being judgmental, and practicing mindful communication.

Deer Culture

On the way to The Little Mermaid this past Friday, my son and I were suddenly stopped...but a deer.  As news spread to family and friends that we hit a deer, responses varied from "glad you are okay" to "I had that happen recently, too" to "do you have a deer whistle?" To friends and family in Oklahoma, California, and Florida, hitting  a deer is a completely foreign thing. For us in the upper Midwest, this is an unfortunate common occurrence, something many of us can relate to, and vocabulary has been created related to this experience. We Minnesotans are part of a Deer Culture.

Misread nonverbals

After completing Chapter 6, you might think I spend too much time analyzing gestures and other body movement. If I am, I'm not the only one. Check out what happened after this picture of Prince Harry and Melania Trump hit social media. From experts to internet trolls, everyone had an opinion of what Prince Henry's strange hand placement meant.

Article on Prince Henry's strange hand placement/gesture

Baby Faces

I find it fascinating how early babies can express their thoughts, feelings, and emotions compared to when they start developing words. My daughter is on the cusp of speech, so it's an especially interesting time to see her nonverbals develop along with her verbals.  Although this isn't my baby, this picture does a great job of illustrating the many faces of a baby.

Power of Nonverbals

I will never forget our final good-bye to my father-in-law. It was the most beautiful fall late morning. We were surrounding his grave in a horseshoe shape, his closest family members and friends. The 21 gun salute veterans were a few yards away.  I looked around at the different expresses our family members held: everything from smiles to sobs. My mother-in-law was all smiles, a smile of pride especially when she was handed the folded flag in honor of her husband's years of service.  I was amazed by both the spectrum of emotions being displayed as well as those who were willing to show their feelings openly versus those who kept their feelings masked. Nonverbal messages can be so powerful.

Hiding the Intrapersonal Communication

I LOVE Homecoming! The dress-up days, the KoMet Pride everywhere, the fun activities, the parade...I love it all.  Although I still love it, today's Homecoming Friday had an unexpected twist.  While I was waving during the parade, my husband had been repeatedly calling me; I had no clue. Towards the end of advisory, we were able to connect. My father-in-law, the man who always greeted me with a huge smile and taught me to polka over 19 years ago, passed away this morning. His health has been on the decline for the past couple of weeks due to heart failure, but I didn't think the last time I saw him on Wednesday would be the last.  I put on my sunglasses, I did my best during the staff dance, I laughed and smiled during the rest of the pepfest, but inside I was a mess. My intrapersonal communication was asking why, sorting out what I knew and didn't know yet, was wondering how my husband was doing, but none of that was showing on the outside, I hope.  My nonverbal communication was not matching my intrapersonal messages at all.

"Strong" self disclosure example

Yesterday, KMHS was honored with having a guest speaker come in and deliver some important messages to the student body and staff as well entertain us with some strength tricks.  John Pritikin shared some very personal stories about his childhood and struggles he experienced growing up.  He was delivering self disclosure after self disclosure that left me laughing at time and crying at others.  He was an amazing story teller verbally and nonverbally.  I wasn't sure what to expect when I heard he was coming to speak, but I have to admit, I was really impressed. At the base of his message, he challenged us to mindful of the messages we are sending and be there to help each other out when we need it.  I'm hoping that both of those become common KoMet behavior.

Under 200

Earlier this week, my husband and I were talking about our budgets. We are a Financial Peace house and follow most of Dave Ramsey's guidelines for budgeting. When we were talking about one of our "envelops" in the system, my husband said we had to be careful because we were "under $200."  What he meant is that we had less than $200 in that fund, $168 to be exact, but because I was not being a mindful communicator and not taking focusing on all his words, I misinterpreted the "under 200" as we were negative $200! I immediately started asking questions because I had no idea how that could have happened. Once he clarified for me what he meant by "under 200," we were both back on the same page. This is an example of ambiguity in communication since were each interpreting the same words differently.